However, the debates at the moment on the exact nature of her duties, how any powers are negated by the governments veto and the extent to which she can be said to represent us have dominated our media with each missing the essential point. They have failed to grasp the primordial instinct driving the Presidents actions at the moment.
It is clear that there are two many women named Mary in Irish politics and McAleese needs to create a legacy of some sort in this era of Mary’s. What careful political orchestration, she clearly took a master class in ‘Political Shaking It Up Big Time’. Class 1: speak at a press conference in Saudi Arabia, in a room where women use a different exit to the men and sit behind a screen. You are there to ensure Saudis continue to use their oil money to buy our butter, you choose to make a some way political statement. Instead of commenting on how your sex is not allowed make eye contact with men in your host country (that would be condoned and make the news after 6.30 when everyone has turned over to ‘Home and Away’), which is so old news, jump on the Cartoon bandwagon knowing you’ll upset people back home. Robinson before her brought Rwandan atrocities to our attention, shook Gerry Adams hand pre cease fire and passed comment on the divorce referendum with no shortage of objection on all accounts. McAleese needs to make her mark in light of such actions. (Don’t forget Robinson’s husband Nick is a cartoonist himself so there would be a tactical team in place to keep her away from microphones were she still our head of state at the moment for the benefit of Irish embassies all over the Middle East at the moment. )
If you look a little deeper though you will see this is part of a Mary manifesto. Let the progression of this blog, from discussing empty rhetorical politics to the epiphany that has been the realisation of the mass political conspiracy that is going on guide you. Let this blog be the first to start asking the real questions- is this the beginning of the men of the Dail creating ‘Stepford Wife’ type women politicians and the dodgy computer system they bought is only programmed to name all its models Mary, maybe the women in place were about to make progress or instill some reform so the men decided to replace them with incompetent bureaucrats? The perplexed look of countless farmers across the country is now easily explained away, no one wanted to deal with them so they got a Mary drone (Coughlan). Lets hope she was programmed some way decently to cope with the bird flu, having her in place was good forward planning for the Dail boys who aren’t too hot on the idea of implementing national strategies. The same thinking clearly applied in allocating the poisoned chalice of Health, give it to a Mary. O’Rourke may have been an early prototype, she was simply sent to the Seanad in the last election for some re-wiring. Was it really a coincidence that the borders of her constituency were altered at election time? Clearly, Robinsons model did not work or maybe it worked too well so she has been sent on an international tour to show how Mary’s can be used to make a mark on the international stage- lets use her to have our first female President. Perception is very important. McAleeses model must be proving effective that they arranged for her to go uncontested, maybe they got Michael D his own Marybot to keep him quite? Is McAleeses programming funny at the moment that she is acting up or is she a pawn in some ploy?
Also, why send a prominent politician such as Charlie McCreevy to Brussels, is he spreading word of the conspiracy or has it already reached their shores and he is looking for funding to upgrade and get sexier deputies? Maybe the hope is that if the women get better looking, T.D’s will turn up in the Dail or people will start watching Oireachtas report? Is this the mad plan of a man who wants to reform public broadcasting and end the torture that is Fair City? We have sent John Bruton to represent the EU in the UN, that can’t be a real job so surely he is the representative of the conspiracy of the States, Hilary Clinton’s days are definitely numbered. Has the technology already reached there, maybe the Democrats swopped the Bush Twins with Mary politicobots? Know now that there are weapons of mass destruction, its title- Project Mary.